


wrong side of reality

by TrenchWarfare



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant through 0.2, Canon Universe, Demyx got norted, Demyxnort, Gen, Possession, Unhappy Ending, non-consensual norting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-25 20:06:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14984621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrenchWarfare/pseuds/TrenchWarfare
Summary: It's just like fading away, but slower.





	wrong side of reality

**** When Demyx wakes up, he's not the same. At first he attributes it to the heart in his chest,  beating hard against his rib cage like it's trying to make up for lost time. It’s a feeling he’s no longer familiar with and something about it feels like an invasion, but he just assumes that's what happens when you spend so much time without one.    
  
It's not until he sees his reflection in the water that he realizes that something is very wrong.    
  
He almost misses it, preoccupied instead with admiring how the ripple of the water really compliments his haircut. He’s not exactly prone to vanity, but something about being dead for a time makes him really appreciate the evidence of his existence when it’s right in front of him. Then something in the water glints, and at first he thinks maybe he dropped something, but all he has is the robe on his back, and his clothes definitely aren't yellow...   
  
When he realizes those are his eyes he panics.    
  
Well, more accurately, he  _ tries  _ to panic. His brain is definitely freaking out, but this heart beats steadily and his body doesn’t seem to think anything is wrong. He’s panicking, right? He  _ should  _ be, and he  _ knows  _ he should be, but the part of his brain that's alarmed seems to be shrinking by the moment. Which should probably freak him out more, but that's such a distant thought that he brushes it aside as soon as it occurs to him.    
  
And soon even his brain has stopped panicking, the heart inside him - not his heart he doesn't think, and he ignores the twist in his gut at that particular thought - is too steady and too overwhelming for him to go against it.    
  
So he follows the heart. He stands, brushing the dirt off his coat, and opens a portal. He hesitates for the briefest moment before stepping inside, somehow knowing that if he steps through there will be no turning back, but the heart lurches and he ignores the foreboding and walks into the darkness.    
  
\---   
  
The castle is quiet and that doesn't bother Demyx as much as it should. His old restless energy isn't quite gone, but locked away deep inside, wherever his panic probably is, so he’s no longer overcome by the desire to fill the silence. It’s still there, and the heart inside him is annoyed by its existence, but it’s muted. Easily ignored. 

His fingers twitch at his side, the ghost of an urge to pluck at strings. He disregards it. 

Something tells Demyx that there's no need to report in, Xemnas surely already knows he's here, so he goes straight to his old room to await orders. Distantly, he’s curious, itching to wander, to find out who else Sora defeated and who else inexplicably survived. But waiting for instructions is more important, so he pushes open the door to his room.   
  
It hasn't been that long since he was last here. Well, he doesn't really know how long it has been, but he was nonexistent for most of it, so it doesn't feel like that long. Either way, he feels like he’s walking into a stranger’s room.   
  
He thinks he probably should feel some kind of connection with the stuff that's lying around, maybe the seashells that litter every surface of the room or the painted ukulele lying abandoned on his bed, but he feels like his emotions are more of a stranger now that he has a heart than they ever were when his chest was empty.    
  
Demyx moves the ukulele to the desk in the corner, clearing space by shoving the shells into a pile off to one side, and sits on the bed. 

And he waits. He’s much more patient than he would have been Before, sitting with a stillness that would have been unheard of in Demyx. He zones out a little bit, which is at least a more familiar feeling, even if his mind doesn’t wander like it used to. Still, he’s relieved that it's not long until he feels that he has a mission. He teleports into his old chair in the congregation room without physically moving from his seat on his bed. 

The room is mostly empty, the only occupants are Xemnas and Saix, who seem to be wrapping up whatever quiet discussion they're having. If it were Before, Demyx probably would have listened in, but now he just patiently waits for his turn.    
  
Eventually he conversation ends and Xemnas waves Saix away. Saix catches Demyx's eye right before the darkness swallows him up, and the blankness in his yellow eyes chills Demyx.    
  
He doesn't allow himself to dwell on the feeling, instead, he looks to Xemnas and waits.    
  
"Our numbers are too low," Xemnas says impassively, "I need you to do some reconnaissance. Scout out some worlds for fitting vessels."   
  
Alarm flares briefly, but the heart quickly tamps it down before Demyx can discern why. He bows his head and says, "Yes, sir."   
  
When Xemnas doesn't offer any further instructions, Demyx lets himself sink back through the darkness to his room. Time to prepare.    
  
\---   
  
Demyx finds himself in Olympus first. And he feels a distant sort of nostalgia, thinking of the first time he fought Sora here. He actually sees the kid running around, dealing with Hades' new bullshit, but Demyx stays hidden, simply making a note of Sora's whereabouts.    
  
He doesn't find many suitable candidates while he’s there. There's Hades, but he's too hot-headed, and who even knows if a god’s body would be able to host a human heart.   
  
This Zack guy shows promise, he's certainly able to handle himself well enough, but he's good-hearted. Good hearts are a lot more effort, and tend to have a lot more friends jumping in to save them at the last minute.    
  
He doesn't report in after leaving, somehow he knows that Xemnas has received his notes. So he heads straight to Arendelle next while Sora is still running around in the clouds.   
  
And, oh, there is plenty of potential here. The queen is powerful, and there is darkness in her just waiting to be brought out. And her affinity for ice would certainly fill a Vexen shaped hole in the organization's heart.    
  
They could send Larxene to corrupt this queen. She has a way with cases like this that none of the other members are really suited for. His mind starts scheming, and it doesn’t even register that he’s not usually the type to plan things.    
  
He has more worlds to scout anyway, so he does some more cursory searching to ensure he hasn't missed anything useful, before preparing to leave.    
  
A flash of silver reflected in some ice catches his eye and he pauses long enough to investigate.    
  
His first thought is that he's going grey, because there are small streaks of silver in his hair. He's much too young for that though, it’s not like he’s Xigbar, and something tells him that this is magical, not natural.    
  
He should be freaked out, another change in his appearance should be cause for panic. But the feeling that surges through him is smugness.    
  
\---   
  
Demyx can feel more of himself slipping away with every day that passes. Too many of his thoughts aren't his, and the ones that are are flung to the side easily. By the time he returns to the castle, his hair is almost completely silver. And he doesn't even care.    
  
He understands on some level that he's not really Demyx. Not anymore. And that bothers him less and less everyday.    
  
Having no heart was preferable to this slow loss of identity.    
  
Demyx feels like a stranger in his own body, or maybe like a stranger is in his body, which is more accurate, but it's not a stranger that this heart belongs to. He hasn't felt this helpless since he faded away. And he's not even allowed these feelings of helplessness, they just get locked away with every other aspect of himself.    
  
And he can't do anything about it. Anytime he even thinks about it, his thoughts are batted away like they're made of paper and more of his identity disappears with them.    
  
It's just like fading away, but slower.    
  
Except there's no dignity in becoming a puppet. At least there was honor in dying in battle. At least his own choices led him to fading the first time. At least when he didn't exist he didn't have to watch himself be used as a vessel of evil.    
  
He wonders if his awareness will get locked away too. He half hopes for it. Blissful obliviousness is better than helplessness at least. Going back to being nonexistent doesn't seem so bad anymore.    
  
He'll just have to wait and see. There's not really much else he can do with his complete lack of autonomy.    
  
\---   
  
He doesn't have to wait long. Being around all of the other Xehanorts back at the castle seems to streamline the process. It's like being in the center of a circle of people who do nothing but enable you and encourage your bad ideas.    
  
Demyx is barely holding onto consciousness, and he's not really sure why he's bothering.    
  
Everyone is making final preparations for the battle ahead. Apparently Sora has amassed his own miniature army of light. But Xehanort is assured that he will prevail, and his twelve vessels can't help but feel that confidence as well.    
  
They have a meeting before their last stand, but it's more of an excuse for Xehanort to monologue to a captive audience. He doesn't seem to care that he's talking to himself. It lasts a full hour and Demyx almost lets go out of boredom. Oblivion would be better than listening to this.    
  
But as soon as he thinks that, Xehanort's eyes snap to his.    
  
"Interesting," Xehanort says, his monologue all but forgotten as he advances on Demyx.    
  
Demyx doesn't answer, not that he could if he wanted to.    
  
Xehanort tilts his head in consideration and levels his keyblade at Demyx. "You still have a bit of the annoying one in you."   
  
Demyx barely has time to feel offended before there's a flash of light.    
  
And then Demyx is gone.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a week ago when my friend was talking about how much they didn't want Demyx to be norted, so of course I had to write some angst. 
> 
> Come say hi to me on twitter @CoIIapsingStar where I cry about KH and various other things a lot


End file.
